The Rapture?

Not long ago, Wife and I took the family over to her parents for a visit. We were having such a good time that the sun set without our permission. The nerve of it. On account of the late hour, it was decided to invade the grandparents’ home through the night. Beds were rearranged and sleeping bags carpeted the living room. A regular grade school style sleepover.

Wife, #7, #8, and I promptly displaced Wife’s youngest brother from his room. He was happy enough to “campout” in the front room with his nieces and nephews. Once the house had been turned upside-down, they all stayed awake until sleep became so overpowering that they could not resist it anymore. As it was my in-law’s house, and their bedtime rules, I strolled to bed and left the children to them.

In the morning, I woke up about six o’clock to the sound of chaos down the hall in the living room. The children were up. I rolled over and went back to sleep. About an hour later I woke up again, this time to silence. I figured that their grandparents had told them to quiet down or sent them outside. However the silence also woke up Wife. To prove that she was the better parent, she got up to investigate.

From the front room she called, “John, where are the kids?”

O.K., that got me up.

I walked into a room of empty sleeping bags. Our six children and two of their uncles were nowhere to be seen. I poked my head out the front door only to find the yard equally empty. Wife and I exchanged puzzled looks. “Did we miss the Rapture?” Wife asked.

It turns out we had not missed the Rapture. Wife’s parents had taken six of our children and two of their uncles out to get donuts. When we saw the grandparents were also missing, Wife called her mother and got the story. I was able to go back to sleep, that is until they all came back.

 The donut feast À la Grandma. It was eight hours before they came off their sugar-high.


The donut feast À la Grandma. It was eight hours before they came off their sugar-high.