What do we do with our children on a trip?
The first, and most obvious answer, is to take them. But that was out of the question. When Wife and I scheduled our cruise, the children were as big concern to us as an empty church is to a Priest. However, the modern world surrounded us, and it was be absolutely no help. Despite the progress made, the best solution was still one as old as the sun. We turned to our mothers.
DISCLAIMER: I am in no way comparing the age of the sun to either of our mothers.
Mothers are wonderful creations. They love you no matter what. They care no matter what. And they are always willing to help you, no matter what. The Giving Tree has nothing compared with a mother.
But grandmothers! Oh, now there is a creation made after Christ’s Own Heart. They will coddle your children no matter what. They will spoil your children no matter what. And they will excuse your children no matter what. They are like a personal politician for your children.
All right then, to be more accurate, we turned not to our mothers, but to our children’s grandmothers.
It took a little persuasion though. One at a time, we sat down with our mothers. Each mother then advised Wife and I to leave the children with her. They assured us that they would have no trouble, and that they wanted the little children for all twelve days. Like a wide-eyed novice listening to a used car salesman, I was persuaded.
I then began to scratch my head. Both grandmothers equally wanted the children. How was I to split the time and make everyone involved happy, with minimal discomfort? I then engineered an elaborate plan that evolved both grandmothers, the grandfathers, our van, the children’s clothes, ten gallons of gas, an intricate pulley system, and a full moon. What could go wrong?
But Wife instead pulled a King Solomon. She split the children right up.
Okay, not precisely a King Solomon. There were no swords, and no individual children were cut in half. Wife picked two girls and two boys to send my mother’s house, and, you guessed it, two girls and two boys to send to her mother’s house. #9 was still attached to Wife, so, he came with us. I just have to stand back and admire Wife’s keen mathematical skills.
That was what we did with our children when we went on our trip. Yes, I was nervous about splitting them up. “They’ve never been apart from one another. They’ve grown up together. They came from the same womb, for goodness sake! What will they do?”
To which, Wife assured me, “They’ll have a vacation of their own.”
And they did.